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When Healing Feels Hopeless
Most of the time I am trying hard to be a positive person for clients and anyone that comes across my website or social media. But I feel like this topic is worth touching on because I do absolutely 10000% understand it.
Several years ago, I was living in a moldy apartment that we could not fix or get away from. I had many times where I felt like I would not make it during this experience. I was incredibly weak, exhausted, constantly anxious, could barely eat, I was reacting to so many different herbs and foods, and I was going through some VERY stressful things in my personal life. It seemed like it was a constant cycle of chaos and stress.
I’ve been out of mold now for exactly 3 years and I can honestly say that I am in a *much* better place now. BUT. It honestly took these entire 3 years to be able to say that. And I still have more to go to truly feel healed.
Healing is hard work. It takes time, and there are so many layers to keep in mind. And in many cases, you will not even learn about one layer until you’re ready to. For example, most people come across diet changes first, then remedies, and then deeper issues like how old trauma and chronic stress can impact our health and wellness. Imagine how overwhelming it would be if we learned *all* of it at once! We’d be in information overload and then freeze because it would all seem so overwhelming.
This is why for most people, healing comes in stages and layers. Once you hit a plateau or you start to feel hopeless, it’s time to re-evaluate everything and see what needs to be changed.
In some cases, the frustration, anger, and whatever other emotion you are having just needs to be felt! Real healing isn’t just about feeling better. It’s also about allowing ourselves to be human. Real humans have many emotions, but so many of us are taught to ignore them from such an early age. Don’t cry, don’t speak up, don’t tell the truth if it’s going to make someone else mad. We learn this and then suppress e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g and our body holds onto it- forever. So sometimes, the emotions that come up at times are telling us something. And sometimes these emotions are linked to things you’ve held onto for many years or things you’ve forgotten about.
Let’s go over some ideas to do if you’re feeling hopeless in your healing journey so that you can move forward and get back to healing.
Listen, I’m not going to lie. Healing needs a LOT of work. There are so many factors to keep in mind. This is why foundational care is crucial for literally everyone. If you haven’t addressed any of these and you’re feeling stuck, then it’s time to work on these!
The main things to keep in mind for overall foundational care are:
- Gut Healing: Without sufficient stomach acid and bile flow, we cannot utilize our nutrients. If our gut isn’t functioning, then our whole body can pay the price. This is just another huge reason why we need to respect our bodies as wholes- everything is connected. Leaky gut healing is a massive first step everyone needs to take to heal.
- Adrenal Support: The adrenals are the emergency glands of the body. With chronic stress and overall nutrient depletion, the adrenals cannot function correctly. This is one of the most important parts of foundational care. If your adrenals are stressed out or completely exhausted then there should be more of a focus on healing them first before even thinking about detoxing anything.
- Nervous System Support: Your nervous system influences your entire body: digestion, brain function, mood, detox, hormones, and more. When the nervous system is dysregulated, nothing can function correctly. Check out my entire post on nervous system healing here.
- Minerals: Minerals are at the absolute base of our foundation- without them, we cannot function. As you get your minerals balanced, it will be easier for your body to handle pathogens, heavy metals, or other underlying issues as well. A copper imbalance is one of the MOST important aspects to address when there is any kind of infection. Bioavailable copper helps with keeping viruses, bacteria, fungi, and parasites under control. The absolute best way to assess minerals and work on overall foundational care is with our Total Body Healing HTMA program– it’s the only HTMA program that works on healing in a truly holistic manner.
- Detox: The LAST part is detox. A stressed, depleted body cannot detox correctly and trying to force it can lead to more stress and depletion. Liver, Lymph, Colon, Kidneys, Skin- we try to assess the most important things to start with once we see a person’s HTMA.
Trauma, Stress, and your Nervous System
Unresolved trauma and current chronic stress are SERIOUS issues. A majority of people seem to deny this. “oh that happened so long ago, I’m over it.” Sorry, that is not how our bodies work. If you have childhood trauma it’s important to understand that your body and brain could not actually process that trauma. Our bodies and brains are not capable when we are kids. This is why it’s crucial to address trauma as an adult.
The same goes for current stressors. If you hate your job, relationships, place where you live- these things influence your mental and physical health. I have seen this SO often in my own life and with clients- it is very hard to heal yourself if you are in a constant state of stress. Some of these things can be very hard to change. Even if you can’t change them right away, keep in mind that your health issues will be hard to shift until you feel safer and calmer.
When we have nervous system dysregulation, our bodies tend to seek out familiar situations. So if all you’ve really known is stress and chaos, then your nervous system is going to seek that. It takes a lot of conscious effort to realize if this is happening to you and to shift it.
This also creates a bit of a victim mode situation subconsciously- we obviously don’t consciously choose to be victims! As someone who has been healing from lifelong trauma, I personally no longer identify as a victim of any sort. I think we can acknowledge our feelings and experiences without falling into a victim mode. We are here to help ourselves heal. You are so powerful. You are so amazing. Your body knows how to heal. It’s normal to have days where you feel like it’s not working or that this effort isn’t worth it. Have those emotions and then get right back to what you know in your heart feels right.
Check out books like “Your Body Speaks your Mind“, “Embodied Healing“, “The Body Keeps the Score“, and Dr. Nicole LePera’s “How to Do the Work to truly understand this crucial piece to the puzzle. I highly recommend somatic healing, but there are SO many ways to address this issue. Read my post here for more ideas.
I can honestly say that if I had not experienced this type of healing myself, it would be hard to believe. The shifts in my own life and health that have happened since addressing trauma has been MASSIVE. This is truly something that holds many people back.
Everyone’s least favorite thing: patience. Healing takes time. Period. There is no way around this. No one just randomly gets sick overnight. Even if your issues seemingly started all at once it’s important to realize that your body was likely struggling heavily for *years* already and it finally hit its limit. Our bodies are very smart and they will try to keep us as balanced and functioning as possible, but sometimes there is one big trigger that just makes the dam burst and suddenly you have all of these health issues. In many cases, these issues have been building up for generations!
Patience is so important. If you’re feeling impatient or stressed that your healing is stalled, take a step back. Start doing things that you find fun. Make plans for the future for when you feel better. Find the love and laughter in your life. While healing can be hard, it doesn’t always need to be heavy. We all need laughter, fun, and love to heal as well, and sometimes we lose sight of this if we’re feeling miserable. The small act of smiling or laughing can create big shifts in your well-being.
No matter where you are at in your healing journey, I hope that you can find peace. Don’t underestimate the little things like joy, being outside, reducing screen time, and allowing yourself to love/be loved.